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You think English is easy?‏


1) The bandage was wound around the wound.

2) The farm was used to produce produce .

3) The dump was so full that it had to refuse more refuse.

4) We must polish the Polish furniture.

5) He could lead if he would get the lead out.

6) The soldier decided to desert his dessert in the desert.

7) Since there is no time like the present, he thought it was time to present the present.

8 ) A bass was painted on the head of the bass drum.

9) When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes.

10) I did not object to the object.

11) The insurance was invalid for the invalid.

12) There was a row among the oarsmen about how to row.

13) They were too close to the door to close it.

14) The buck does funny things when the does are present.

15) A seamstress and a sewer fell down into a sewer line.

16) To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow..

17) The wind was too strong to wind the sail.

18) Upon seeing the tear in the painting I shed a tear.

19) I had to subject the subject to a series of tests.

20) How can I intimate this to my most intimate friend?


Let's face it - English is a crazy language. There is no egg in eggplant, nor ham in hamburger; neither apple nor pine in pineapple. English muffins weren't invented in England or French fries in France . Sweetmeats are candies while sweetbreads, which aren't sweet, are meat. We take English for granted. But if we explore its paradoxes, we find that quicksand can work slowly, boxing rings are square and a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.

And why is it that writers write but fingers don't fing, grocers don't groce and
hammers don't ham? If the plural of tooth is teeth, why isn't the plural of booth, beeth? You have one goose, 2 geese; so one moose, 2 meese? One index, 2 indices?

Doesn't it seem crazy that you can make amends but not one amend? If you have a bunch of odds and ends and get rid of all but one of them, what do you call it?

If teachers taught, why didn't preachers praught? If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat?

Sometimes I think all the English speakers should be committed to an asylum for the verbally insane. In what language do people recite at a play and play at a recital? Ship by truck and send cargo by ship? Have noses that run and feet that smell?

How can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same, while a wise man and a wise guy are opposites? You have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a language in which your house can burn up as it burns down, in which you fill in a form by filling it out and in which, an alarm goes off by going on.

English was invented by people, not computers, and it reflects the creativity of the human race, which, of course, is not a race at all. That is why, when the stars are out, they are visible, but when the lights are out, they are invisible.

PS. - Why doesn't 'Buick' rhyme with 'quick' ?


Ghost

awesome!!! lol
LG Sabine

Tja, English ist halt nicht ganz einfach...

Ein Pole meldet sich zu einen Englischkurs an und sagt zu dem Kursleiter: "I have to polish my Englisch" Darauf der Lehrer:"Well, I'd say your Englisch is polish enough"


LG, Heidi

und Du kannst die alten Germnanen dafür verantwortlich machen:

http://www.englishclub.com/english-language-history.htm

Zitat von Heidi K.

---

Tja, English ist halt nicht ganz einfach...

---

Richtig!

Siehe Beispiel "German Coast Guard":

http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=1365353836237246497#


Tschiiers


tomaha

Zitat von tomaha

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Zitat von Heidi K.

---

Tja, English ist halt nicht ganz einfach...

---

Richtig!

Siehe Beispiel "German Coast Guard":

http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=1365353836237246497#


Tschiiers


tomaha

---

Schon 1000 mal gesehen, aber immer wieder ein Brueller.

noch nie gesehen, aber ich hab weit aufgerissene augen...

wie hart!

aber geil!

Can Cold Water Clean Dishes?
___________________________

This is for all the germ conscious folks
who worry about using cold water to clean.


John went to visit his 90 year old grandfather
in a very secluded, rural area of Saskatchewan

After spending a great evening chatting the night away,
the next morning John's grandfather prepared
breakfast of bacon, eggs and toast.

However, John noticed a film like substance on his plate,
and questioned his grandfather asking,

'Are these plates clean?'

His grandfather replied,

'They're as clean as cold water can get em.
Just you go ahead and finish your meal, Sonny!'

For lunch the old man made hamburgers.

Again, John was concerned about the plates,
as his appeared to have tiny specks around
the edge that looked like dried egg and asked,

'Are you sure these plates are clean?'

Without looking up the old man said,

'I told you before, Sonny, those dishes are as
clean as cold water can get them. Now don't you
fret, I don't want to hear another word about it!'

Later that afternoon, John was on his way to a nearby town
and as he was leaving, his grandfather's dog
started to growl, and wouldn't let him pass.

John yelled and said,

'Grandfather, your dog won't let me get to my car'.

Without diverting his attention from the football game
he was watching on TV, the old man shouted!

'Coldwater, go lay down now, yah hear me!'

Meet Coldwater ! Have a fabulous STRESS FREE weekend! Beste Grüße
Yukonpaul

hihi! wie witzig!

Das ist wirklich klasse!